Rebirth of Autotune

As someone with a bad singing voice, this whole auto-tune craze is very exciting. After watching any episode of American Idol, it becomes instantly apparent that the possession of a good singing voice is inversely related to the amount of personality any given person possesses. This is why it is extremely disheartening for me to hear Jay-Z bash the rising auto-tune trend on his latest single "D.O.A (Death of Autotune)". But Jay-Z, isn't it true that studio tricks have been instrumental in creating some of the most groundbreaking works in the past (e.g. any drug-addled Beatles album)? Why cut down this phenomenon well before it has reached its full potential? And are we really supposed to take pop-culture advice from a guy who tried to bring rap rock back through his collaboration with angst-ridden suburban tween favorites, Linkin Park? Jay, why not take a look at the treasures Auto-Tune has blessed the world with thus far:

Zapp & Roger: "Computer Love", 1985
Zapp and Roger revolutionize R&B music by utilizing Auto-Tune on their single "Computer Love", a song that would sound more at home as the theme of Nick Arcade than as the soundtrack of any foray into love making. Still the song seemed prophetic, predicting the coming ubiquity of internet pornography.

Cher: "Do You Believe?", 1998
Cher returns to public consciousness singing a "Night at the Roxbury" banger. The world breathes a heavy sigh of relief as the music video does not feature an even older Cher once again in fishnet stockings on a battle ship.

Kid Rock "Only God Knows Why", 1999.
Kid Rock shows a sensitive side with this Auto-Tune inflected country ballad. Well... at least an attempt at sensitivity.

T-Pain "Buy You a Drank (Shawty Snappin')", 2007
T-Pain forecasts his Saturday Night sexual adventures. First he's going to buy you a drink, then he will take you home with him, and then he is going to make sweet love to you, and you will be all like "Ooh, Ooh, Ooh". And how could the ladies possibly resist a man with such a syruppy robotic voice who, when walking around night clubs, leaves a trail of money behind him like some sort of financially incompetent pied piper?

Snoop Dogg "Sensual Seduction", 2007
Snoop Dogg brings back the 70's with autotune, a keytar and a sexual magic carpet ride in a turban. The song takes its rightful place in the Snoop Dogg canon next to classics like "Murder was the Case" and "Down for my N****z"

Lil Wayne: "Lollipop", 2008
Lil Wayne jumps on the autotune bandwagon using the most obvious sexual metaphor ever. The world feels a little nauseous at the thought of having sex with Lil Wayne.

Kanye West 808's and Heartbreaks, 2008
Kanye West sets aside his usual grandiloquent, narcissistic rapper persona in order to release an album of spacy, slightly-less narcissisic jams sung through Auto-Tune. This new R&B singer side of Kanye is highlighted by a jeri curl mullet. Zapp and Roger lameness returns full circle.

Why stop here?